Finally!!!

So lets back up about five months ago...

I was at my worst physically. Exercise? That was a dvd I put in every now and then but could never stay with it for longer than a few months. Emotionally I was still dealing with a lot and I think it showed. I was always stressed out. Worried, Angry, Miserable. I put on a happy face most of the time but it would always catch up with me and whoever was around me would get the brunt of it... usually my husband or my son. Something had to change. I had always wanted to deal with the depression naturally but at this point I needed to make a decision to go see my doctor and get on an anti-depressent or really do something about it. I choose the later. 

I paid for ten personal training lessons with old friend Reilly Barrett at a local gym. He had already roped Daniel into a gym membership because he had all the CrossFit gear there for his classes but said Daniel could use it for his own workouts. Daniel had joined Redding CrossFit a couple years ago and loved it but with his work schedule it made it difficult for him to get it. So this was great. To say he was supportive was a complete understatement. He was ecstatic. I just figured I'd get comfortable working out in a gym, figure out how to work all those blasted machines and give myself a fighting chance to get into a grove that I could keep. Reilly had other plans...

Daniel hitting his max box jump: 50.25 inches!

We both got completely hooked. I went from barely able to do a three minute workout of box jumps and kettle bell swings (dry heaves included) to awakening this inner athlete I had no idea was there! The best part is you're not doing it alone. The group of people I get to workout with were a huge part of why I decided to join. Everyone is in the same boat. We all want to be pushed beyond what we think is impossible for ourselves and when that happens, that feeling... it's addicting! All the high-fives and the fist bumps, it all seems so silly but the truth is it works! The camaraderie and trust I have gained with that group of people is very special to me. Reilly and Katharyn were such life savers. Reilly is a great coach and Katharyn was there in the beginning doing workouts with me so I wouldn't feel alone. I owe them everything. 

Along with working out 4-5 times a week I have been seeing a therapist, getting adjusted from our wonderful chiropractor and learning to eat a more balanced diet I am living a more balanced life now. Not to say I'm not dealing with things because life is crazy, it always will be. But I've learned how to deal with it in a healthy manner. I am so happy to be where I am. For once in my life I feel comfortable in my own skin. I'm not settling anymore. I'm not just going thru life, I am really living it! 

                                                                    Our "little" man.

Other good things in life: Daniel is doing Tough Mudder this September in Tahoe with his buddies from the academy. This year, I'm a spectator but maybe if I can get over the major "dirt factor" I'll sign up for one in the future! Our little man is four going on ten. We signed him up for soccer this year and Daniel's already bummed he can't coach. Maybe next year. We have hopes of him going to Redding School of the Arts next year and thus starting the next BIG step in our lives. 

-MG

As a Blogger

I'm fired.  Well, I should be.  I can't believe my last post was back in June!  I'm sorry people, I will try and keep on it.  I am on the edge of delirium from exhaustion, but I wanted to say there will be a new blog very soon!

Oh, Lorne and I bagged Shasta, here's a pic from on the way back down.

Full story on this trip soon.  Next up is Mt. Whitney, maybe a couple other peaks the same week.  Today I was really itching to get out into the woods.  Life is so simple out there.

Ok, this is a totally random quick blog, more of a "Facebook" update I guess.  More blogging to come, I promise!

Fourteeners

It's getting close to the time of year that I make an annual backpacking trip with my co-worker from the bay.  Two years ago we backpacked to Papoose Lake, one of the most grueling physical experiences I have ever experienced!  Then last year we had a mellow trip to Big Duck Lake.  This year we started texting to make plans and he asked about Shasta.  I thought that might be a little intense for this annual trip, but then he mentioned that he felt like we need to summit something and I agreed.

Then he took it further.  He mentioned that we should summit all the Fourteeners in California.  One 14,000 foot altitude mountain a year for 12 years.  Now that sounds like a man adventure!  I want to do it now.  If we can do it, I'll be 41 when we summit the last peak.  It is good to have some life goals and I am excited about this one.  So here's to California's Fourteeners!

                                                             Mount Shasta - 14,179' 

                                                             Prominence - 9,832'

-dg

Asking The Hard Questions, Discovering The Easy Answers

So I've been thinking a lot lately. Thinking about life. Thinking about death. How things around us mold who we are. How we think. How we act. How we treat others. And unless we choose to stop and ask ourselves, "Why, exactly, do I live the way I do" we would continue to do so until the bitter end. Completely oblivious to anything outside of our little rat race bubble we call life. I recently turned twenty-five and I can honestly say that the last couple years has been thee most challenging years of my life. People who were my rock when I was younger have hurt me harder then I could ever imagine and continue to do so. Others have come into my life and I could not imagine life without them. Some friendships have come back from being stagnant and others have progressed from uninterrupted, perfectly sustained, purposeful love and attention.

I have also mentally removed myself from a traditional word that I've been raised with my whole life. Or maybe I should say that I'm a new hybrid version of the word. I call myself a "No Bull-Shit Christian". I love Jesus. And I have a relationship with Him. I believe that I am called to show people who may or may not believe in anything His undying, uninterrupted, unbroken, endless, love. That's it.

I am tired of people (most of them who call themselves Christians) living in a little subculture not able to be a normal, decent human being in the real world. The world they are all trying to change. I used to be one of them. And of course I didn't see it like that at the time. I was just doing what I thought was right. Until I started questioning it a bit. "Am I more special then someone because I'm on the worship team? Am I closer to God because I manifest it in a physical way? Why do I have to go to church every Sunday? Does that make me a better Christian than someone who doesn't make the time to go?" And I never noticed how exactly I would be affected by that thought process until I experienced it first hand for myself. When I got a job that required me to work weekends I was unable to continue my hardcore routine of Sunday church. Not because I realized yet, but because I just worked Sundays. That's it. So when weeks went by, then months, I lost all the connections that I thought were so solid. Turned out it was just because we're all part of a club and if you stopped going, you wouldn't really ever see them again. Until one day when I was working at my job (which in the christian world would be a little scandalous and had me dressing and wearing a lot of makeup) and I was instantly judged by a woman who used to pray and intercede for me while I was on the worship team. She didn't recognize me. She didn't smile at me. She didn't even talk to me. But I was judged and I could feel it as a human being. From that moment on I changed. I had an epiphany. That was a woman who was supposed to represent God's love and she couldn't even look at me and say hello. All she did was judge me. Who the hell do you think you are to judge me? You don't know me at all. But we all do this, all the time. Who the hell am I to treat someone like they're inferior to me? So I don't. At least it's my lot in life now to not judge anyone anymore. But I'm human. And I am not perfect and I catch myself doing it but I believe it's not just a choice, it's a lifestyle.

So here's my deal. I prefer quality then quantity. Quality in people. Quality in life. Family is the most important thing to me. My husband and my son is my joy, my work is my quest for peace, my life is for loving and to never take a single thing for granted.

-MG